Sunday, September 04, 2005

Signs of a failing relationship

Signs of a failing relationship
We often find ourselves asking if your partner is for real. The last advice I gave was how to get over a break-up. Now here are telltale signs to tell you it's time to jump ship or you sink with it.

1. Your partner suddenly needs time for themselves.
Ok, the common excuse. Since when did you guys need time away from each other when you can't stand being away? It's a withdrawal symptom. The first step in staying away from you. Most of the time is the claim of independence or some lame excuse like they don't want to be around you too much because they might be dependent on you.

2. They slowly take away from the time you're supposed to have together
"Sorry, honey, I have something to settle this weekend" or "I have to do this or I'll lose my job." or "I think I have to do this because I need it." This goes in conjunction with the first sign. Slowly, but consistently taking from your time together that before ou know it you have no time at all. C'mon, this is the ultimate ingredient that things are falling apart.

3. Suddenly so busy.
It never bothered you guys before. Why now? No matter how busy you guys were you always found time for each other. But now your partner isn't even trying. Always too tired to see you or have no time for a quick meet when all you ever wanted was to see their faces.

4. What you want they don't want.
Suddenly the things you enjoy doing or the things you want to get have no interest to them.

This doesn't need figuring out. It's obvious that they just want to contradict you because they just don't want it your way.

5. Changing of priorities.
Things they used to value, promises they made when the relationship was fresh eventually become pushed into the backstage. You find yourself being told that "this is not important" or "that is not important" when in fact you have agreed that this all of the things you treasured are important. Suffice it you are one of these "things" that are no longer "THAT IMPORTANT".

6. Renewal of vows
...and I don't mean marriage, folks. When you remind them of all the sweet things they did or said or promised they deny ever saying it or have completely forgot. This is because of their pulling away. They want nothing to do with you and are ashamed of it. I know it hurts but let's just get with reality. Nobody is like us romantics who can promise the sun, the moon, the stars and throw in eternity as a package deal.

7. Everything is just cold.
All the spark of enthusiasm is gone. When the flames die down reality sets in. It just wasn't love but just words. Ever felt like you're now being ignored? Useless? Forgotten?

Once all of these things are showing up too coincidentally it's time to close shop and jump ship will you still can. If you hold on, there's a big chance the damage is far, far worse. Ever heard of people being sucked down by a sinking ship? Save yourself, coz sure as hell your partner won't. They will be the last person to help you when all this goes down.

Here's one snap of reality for all of you reading this: Falling out of love is OUR reality. Deal with it because there will always be people out their who claim an unfaltering love but will eventually douse it down with their own selfish needs.

Conclusion.

These things don't necesarily mean a 3rd party. As some of you probably heard me say

"There's more than one way to cheat in a relationship." Two-timing is just one of them but definitely not the only way to hurt you.

I have no explanation for people falling out of love. It just happens. What we can do is deal with it because there will always be people out there willing to take advantage of us.

1 comment:

chubbygurl said...

well..well...a failing relationship is when you have many excuses...and then eventually..u wake up one morning and then find out that its OVER!!

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