Monday, September 18, 2006

Faith No More

Faithlessness. This is what I am...or is it? By whose rights, culture and religion define my beliefs? By whose definition and judgement does it define my "sin" or my "heresy".

I am a believer of sorts - someone who has shaped his very beliefs to his own life's understanding. I was born with a religion once but that was when I was forced to choose one and ONLY one, which was a clear violation of my civil rights. For a large fraction of my life I spent kissing the anal receptacle of religious authority up until when I realized the truth - that every religion, no matter how noble, how righteous, how dignified they seem were in fact, SAVAGES. I've realized that no religion is "pure" even if they claim their actions were just. I am instinctively a man of questioning nature. Someone who doesn't follow beliefs blindly. The only thing I can offer others is my loyalty. I don't have to know what you know. I don't even have to believe what you believe. But as long as we live on this same earth I continue to listen to you and if you give me an ideal I can work with I will follow anyone.

But the fact remains that I don't follow by religious faith. As sadistic and violent I can be by nature I am still a civilized human being. But what defines "civilization"? The laws of a certain race or culture? What defines good and evil?

I ask these questions because as much as I admit that I have sinned, who will judge my actions as a sin? As I write this entry I'm pretty sure that a good number of "religious" people will brand me an anti-christ, a satanist, a heathen, a heretic and my personal favorite - a blasphemer. To put it simply, as long as I don't follow anyone's beliefs I will be branded as an outcast. It's not because I am evil it's because I do not conform and comply with the general public's ideals. As one famous line once said: "Traitors are not defined by themselves but by the people they betrayed." What that means is I am either good or bad based on everyone's pitiful, desperate and narrow-mindedness. The true judge here is not God but people. Everyone claims to know what God wants, what God feels and what God thinks. But when confronted with this fact I am faced with thousands of years worth of well-versed, well-practiced, and virtually memorized list of excuses. Why else did they fabricate their "sacred text"? To document their excuses, course! In other words, I'm just told to believe. Don't ask questions. Just stand there like an idiot. If everyone else is out there doing the same no one really notices "that the emperor is naked". I expected no less from them. That's why I feel it pointless to argue and instead resort to this entry in which none of you sorry ass retards can ever debate.

If I were born during the time of the peak of their influence, I would be stoned, hanged, burned, whipped, crucified or raped (yep, that's one of the unknown facts of these religions). In case you're too stupid to realize the obvious, why would I follow a religion dedicated to promoting peace and humanity but actually have perfected methods of torture? Ironic as it is, where else would you find hypocrisy except from the one place who defined words such as these? Some have gone as far as declaring their beliefs as "not a religion" to exclude themselves from the commonality. Religion is religion. Call it what you want but it's still the same to me and I would be a fool not to realize that.

The sad truth about religion is that none of them were ever created by Gods but by men and men alone - out of fear, out of desperation and out of ignorance. Men by nature have low self-esteem. Without the belief of a higher being, man would simply crumble in self-pity and helplessness. A creature without a purpose. I have outgrown such childish beliefs and accepted reality that you face the world just like every creature on earth. You come and you go. I don't need a higher being to tell me my purpose. My purpose is for me alone to decide.

No religion is pure. I don't want your excuses and I don't want your scriptures and lies. End of story. PERIOD. I'm shutting you out just as you shut out everyone else from questioning you.

It's not that I don't believe in a higher being (a God so to speak), I just don't want to follow spiritual beliefs fabricated by men for whatever reason (try ignorance) throughout history and then "marketed" to the masses. It just doesn't work for me! I'd rather be a devil in the eyes of a church and be free than to be a saint and be their slave.

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