Tuesday, December 26, 2006

Of Men and Dogs

The world is a constant dick-waving struggle. A never-ending testosterone war of Neanderthals. Seriously, it's times like these that I feel ashamed to be a human being - a male one at that.

I really hate the fact that wars are just a metaphor for comparing dick sizes. Really now! Someone once said this! Wars are basically a comparison of who's got the biggest di...er... missiles, rockets , bullets and any form of long shafted projectile. It's pure hypocrisy really. We're just screwing each other - literally.

Coincidentally, another non-human specie has this same behavior of some sort. I somewhat liken the human male species as a bunch of dogs. You see, some dogs are all so big and feeling so tough and the only way you can shut them up is to beat them with a big stick until they break down into a whimpering stupor. That's the same thing you do with men. They walk around feeling invincible and untouchable - the brainless masculinity syndrome. Walk up to them with a gun or just beat the crap out of them to put them in their place and they end up just like that dog I mentioned. The only difference and, amusingly significant, is that dogs don't talk behind your back and give pathetic excuses why they lost to you.

A single man or an entire nation has this kind of mentality. "We are powerful." Drop the bomb and they cower in silence; their pride broken. If only their arrogance were as true as their loss they would have fought till their dying breath but, no, they were put in their place of shame and fearing for their lives. If only most of us would live in the fact that we die with pride or live in shame. However, we still like to value our pitiful lives more than our pride. The only thing bigger than pride is life and any big, steel-balled man has walked that path.

If we were really so powerful we wouldn't have to show it off by waving our dicks in the air because ANY man can strike anyone down unexpectedly so stop being so conspicuous and let's all but our dicks in our pants.

If one day you bump into some other guy and he suddenly lashes out feeling all so tough at you, just remember it's just his way of showing his dick. You have the option to kick him in the balls or, if you're good with words, put his manly esteem to shame.

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