Tuesday, January 25, 2011

How to tell if a woman is overreacting

No man is a match for a woman’s tears.

Let's face it, ladies & gentlemen. Women are a bundle of emotions. After all these years of observation I've broken it down to a simple science. It's quite simple really. Just answer these simple yes or no questions. 

  • Is she physically injured?
  • Is there a threat to her life?
  • Is her house on fire?
  • Is she on fire?
  • Did you kill someone our did someone die as a result of your actions?
  • Is the world coming to an end?
Also, do note that I did not ask if she's "dying" because "dying" is a very subjective term to her.

You must answer "no" to ALL of them for it to be safe to assume that whatever trauma she is going through right then is psychologically self-inflicted. It is best to downplay the situation and meet it with utmost indifference and passivity. Humoring her will drive you to the edge of insanity. ;)


P.S. Yes I am occasionally a sexist. Feel free to rally your "sympathizers". I could use the traffic - good OR bad.

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